you can't keep a good girl down

I had a mini meltdown today.

I've been sick for so long, coughing and coughing and I can't seem to get any better. I've finished the medication the gynae gave me (a really scary bottle which had the word "Poison" all over its box) and I'm still coughing. And now, it's worse. See, for a while now, every time I cough, my tailbone hurts. I don't know why. Pressure from the baby, maybe? Usually, the pain goes away once I'm done coughing, so I ignore it. Anyway, I coughed so much and so badly yesterday night, my tailbone area hurts so so bad, I can't walk today. Can't sit. Can't lie down. Can't get up from a chair/bed. Can't move, can't cough without pain. (How do you stop yourself from coughing?) And it's not just a little pain. It's excruciating. A sharp shooting kind of pain. I've taken a panadol but it's useless against the pain.

I don't mean to whine, but the pain is just so bad.

I asked Hunny just now if we could talk to the gynae and have baby come out next week. After all, 37 weeks is full term, isn't it? Hunny said no - it's the only sensible reply, really, since I was being ridiculous, but I felt so sorry for myself, I couldn't stop the tears.

I remember once reading a post in a forum for preggies. The post was titled, "Get this baby out of me!" or something like that. The author was full term and looking for natural ways to induce labour. Needless to say, the author got flamed real bad. Lots of other women responded to her post, saying that she should not try to hurry things, but that the baby would come out when he/she was ready.

I tell you - today, I totally understand the author's point of view.

My mood's coming through in my scrapping too. Here's the latest I did. I scrapped this layout for an online challenge. The requirements were: no cardstock to be used, and the layout had to be about myself. It's amazing how what's in your subconscious winds its way into your hands... (and in case you were thinking that this was pain-induced, let me emphasize that this was done prior to the onset of the pain)

It's titled, Remember Me This Way:



A printed transparency overlays the photo and journalling. This flower embellishment acts as a tab/page turner.



I used the Zutter tool to punch holes and threaded ribbon through them to hold the page and transparency together.



The best part? The journalling says it all. Reflects the mood I'm feeling.





if I were to
leave you
never to return
would you
remember me
this way?

loving wife
joyous mother to be
filial daughter
caring sister
passionate child of God
cherished friend
cheerful singer
whimsical scrapper

bringer of
love and
laughter to
those around
me?